pruesaysit.com

Keep On Truckin’

Tonight, my friends, I am fucked. Absolutely knackered.
Go figure I’m staying another year on this lease partly because the thought of having to move house again makes my lady bits shrivel up and die, yet what did I do all day today? I moved. Thankfully not my own shit, but Nates accumulated crap. Who knew a man who’d been in Melbourne less than two years could amass such a huge amount of stuff.

He hired a truck and was expecting a mate to help him but that fell through, so that’s where I come into it. So without another burly man to help, it was just one burly man and a fat chick who isn’t as strong as she lets on. My arms feel like an ambidextrous teenage boys’ and I’m all burnt from being out in the sun. Oh, and while the fiddle is out, I also sliced my finger open last night. I tore it open again today and so much blood came out of it, I felt all woozy and had to have a brief spew behind a tree in Nates front yard.

We had to have the truck back tonight, so we finally got back to Box Hill to drop it off and pick up his car around 1am. Then on to his place to retrieve his feline buddies, and then finally home. I’m rooted, but Nate is sleeping and I figured I’d let him sleep for a while before I climb in and inevitably wake him with my snoring. I’m a good egg like that

So now I have 3 cats wandering around, a heavy breathing hobo in my bed, extreme passangers arm sunburn and a back that aches like I’ve had an evening at Hellfire.
See why I’m never moving house again? Being a nomad is too much work. So much heavy lifting and grunting and sweating in areas you shouldn’t sweat and a pleathora of other reasons I’m too lazy to detail here.

Tomorrow I’ll be taking advantage of Nates availability and his penchant for putting other peoples lives in order by taking up his suggestion of cleaning my room. Thankfully he tells me I normally just get in the way and I try and hoard as much as possible when the aim of the game is to de-clutter, so I’ll be able to kick my feet up and watch him simplify the chaos.
After that, the plan for the next few days is simple- Spend as little as possible. Which should be relatively easy given the current balance of my bank account. Expect many updates this weekend thus signalling my presence behind the PC, where spending is easier to avoid than at Southland.

I’m going to bed. If you don’t hear from me in the next few days, assume I’m dead and have been eaten by an angry Siamese.

My attempt at what I thought was a Haiku…

Edit: Thanks to Desci for pointing out a Haiku is 5,7.5 haha
Let’s just write this one off as one of those post modern poems that are so good they don’t follow any rhyme or reason.

Big Breakfast

We had a Sunday morning Big Breakfast over the weekend. As expected, it was fucking amazing. Eggs, Tomatoes, Half a Pig, Hashbrowns, Spinnach, Toast, Beans, Bread, Orange Juice, Chocolate Milk, Onions, Fried Mushrooms… All consumed under the sunshine of our backyard, complete with both The Sunday Age and Herald Sun. Sundays don’t get any better than this, my friends.

  For more pictures of breakfast, just click go to here.

 The rest of the weekend was spent doing weekendy kind of stuff, like going to Ikea, going shopping for groceries, vegging out on the couch and watching a dvd with mates.

I got one of those threatening letters of impending legal action over a bill today. Eugh! Stupid AGL.

I don’t think the guy who works at my local servo thinks I’m particularly amusing. I was standing in line with Loz, waiting for him to finish chatting up some bird in front of us. He was taking ages, so I announced that Loz and I would just wait til his speed dating session was over. He didn’t laugh. We did. A lot. The girl didn’t find it amusing either. The akwardness that followed was the funniest part.

Why are Crunchie chocolate bars always broken in half?

Memage

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
God help us all.

2. How much cash do you have on you?
I have $11.50 floating around in my handbag.

3. What’s a word that rhymes with “DOOR?”
Al Gore

4. Favorite planet?
Omacron Perseii 8

5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?
My dad. He was calling to tell me some more information on the guy he’s trying to set Teeda up with.

6. What is your favorite ring tone on your phone?
Johnny Cash- Ring of Fire

7. What shirt are you wearing?
A jumper that my dad loaned me. I should have given it back by now, but it’s just so damn warm and cosy.

8. Do you “label” yourself?
Yeah, I label myself as “Rockabilly”, “Fat Chick”, “Tart”… I could go on. 

9. Name the brand of the shoes you’re currently wearing?
Not a shoe kind of person. I’m barefoot 80% of the time

10. Bright or Dark Room?
Bring on the sunshine! Although, you’d have a rough time guessing I liked sunshine, given that I’m almost translucent.

11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?
I actually don’t know much about this person…I’ve read their blog on and off for about 18 months now though. I like the way she phrases her posts.

12. What does your watch look like?
Like the bottom right hand corner of my computer monitor

13. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Geeking it up

14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
“Hey can someone please hang my clothes out that’s in the washing machine? Please? I forgot to do it last night! And stick in the pants that are sitting beside the washing machine, only if you have time to do it tho! Thanks!” -Teeda

15. Where is your nearest 7-11?
Chelsea Heights

16. Whats a word that you say a lot?
“Get Fucked!” not in an aggressive way, but in a “Oh REALLY?” way

17. Who told you he/she loved you last?
Loz on her way to bed last night

18. Last furry thing you touched?
Buckethead

19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days?
6 Aropax tablets. They’re anti depressants. I take 2 a day.

20. How many rolls of film do you need developed?
I predicted the demise of 35mm film back in 1997. Go figure I was right?! I don’t need any film developed. Haven’t in years.

21. Favorite age you have been so far?
Twenty Four has been wonderful to me.

22. Your worst enemy?
Myself generally.

23. What is your current desktop picture?
A picture of Buckethead looking sad.  It makes me laugh…Hard.

24. What was the last thing you said to someone?
“Night sweetheart” to Teeda as she went to bed.

25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be?
Million bucks. If you could fly, you’d have to do it in secret all the time, otherwise would be asking you how you did it all the time, and I think you’d get over being a novelty for other people quite quickly.

26. Do you like someone?
Hrmmm, not presently. I had a crush recently but they call it a crush for a reason.

27. The last song you listened to?
GreenDay - When September Ends. It was playing at the pub as we left.

28. What time of day were you born?
8.13am

29. Whats your favorite number?
13

30. Where did you live in 1987?
Keysborough

31. Are you jealous of anyone?
Not of a particular person, but am jealous of other peoples attributes and material posessions.

32. Is anyone jealous of you?
I’m gonna go out on a limb and say yes. I’m not sure what for, but I’d like to think someone out there is cursing me for my damn good looks.

33. Where were you when 9/11 happened?
I must have heard the news in the background that morning as I was dozing in and out of sleep. I caught bits and pieces of it, but when I woke up I thought it might have been part of a wierd dream I was having. I was informed otherwise.

34. What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
Look for a phone number to call so I can complain and have my money refunded.

35. Do you consider yourself kind?
Most of the time. I can be a right bitch when I need to though.

36. If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be?
If I had to get another one, it would be a full back piece with pinup girls, Sailor Jerry inspired pieces, with a hint of Day of the Dead vibe.

37. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?
Hebrew or Latin.

38. Would you move for the person you loved?
Hrmmm it would depend on whether I was in the position to have family and friends visit often, or vice verca.

39. Are you touchy feely?
Perhaps a little too much.

40. What’s your life motto?
Better to regret what you’ve done, than that which you haven’t.

41. Name three things that you have on you at all times?
Mobile, Smokes, Lighter.

42. What’s your favourite town/city?
Wagga Wagga. So good they named it twice.
PS. I’m lying, but I’ve been dying to use that phrase for a long time.

43. What was the last thing you paid for with cash?
Chicken Parma at the pub.

44. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?
I didn’t write a letter, but I did just mail an envelope that contained a Meat Pie wrapper and the HAIR that was found inside said pie!

45. Can you change the oil on a car?
Yes, Yes I can.

46. Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?
He was shacked up with some bird and living somewhere near Hampton Park.

47. How far back do you know about your ancestry?
My mothers mothers parents were Irish and French. Her French father was a Real Estate Agent. He made his wife breakfast in bed, every day of their marriage til he died. His name was Gabriel. Her name was Kathleen. They called her Kaki.
My mothers Fathers parents were Irish. He was one of about 16 children. The natural auburn highlights in my hair come from his Mother who was a redhead.
My Fathers grandfather was hit by a truck on Warrigal Road, and died in hospital from complications from the accident.

48. The last time you dressed fancy, what did you wear and why did you dress fancy?
I haven’t had occasion to dress fancy for a while, so I can’t remember what I wore.

49. Does anything hurt on your body right now?
Nup. I just felt around, and everything is hunkey dorey.

50. Have you been burned by love?
Scorched into cinders.

All aboard the virtual tour

We changed the house around a little yesterday, so I thought I’d share with you some pictures of the place I call home. Would you believe, this is the first time I’ve been in the same house longer than 12 months in the last 6 years? I regrettably hand back my title of Nomad.

What you see as you open the door. Features include Buckethead mid scratch, Bucketheads hiding place, Didgeridoo, Guitar I can’t play and Elvis Rasturbation.

Our Loungeroom. The coffee table was a hard rubbish collection find, would you believe? The neighbours opposite us were throwing it out, so we took it with their blessing. Buckethead and the pink shoes are mine.

Contents of the coffee table include;
Padlock for Nates bungalow
Ten dollars change from last nights KFC
Packet of hooks that are too small for the job they were bought for
TV and DVD remotes
National Lampoons Vacation DVD (one of my top ten films)
How to Play Poker book
Several copies of Real Living Magazine
Graceland- A Tour of Elvis Presleys House coffee table book
Lighter in cute purple case

View from behind the couch, including Entertainment unit and matching Nest of Tables. It’s one of the few matching pieces of furniture I own. It makes me feel like a grown up.

Loz bought a Lazy Susan when she was in Tassie, which now resides on the entertainment unit, to the side of the TV. On top is Buddha statue, photo of the gals I live with and myself looking hot as and behind that, is a black and white photo of a basketball team circa 1976. We don’t know who they are, it was found at an Op Shop. The guy in the front row to the right is a hottie.

Basket of Cd’s, Untuned guitar that ceases to make any noises that would be classified as ‘musical’, hard rubbish collection tall basket holding some sticks and a piece of something I’m not sure of that was picked up on the side of the road. God, I’m such a scab.

Moving up, you’ll see our $10 Ikea floor lamp that’s never been used, a piegion hole set of shelves and part of our “pantry”.

Contents of pigeon holes include some dvd’s, an old timey camera that Loz owns, some original Elvis 45’s, red nailpolish that we all share and paint our toenails with and next to that, a bunch of rocks we stole from a neighbours front yard.

Elvis 45 and the Journal Teeda bought me that I’m too afraid to write in, because it’s so damn pretty.

Our alternative to the conventional pantry. It’s the sex. Loz painted it up yesterday and it’s gorgeous!

Sitting on top of our fridge is my sewing machine, a massive can of “Fruit Salad in Natural Juice” that will never, ever be eaten but we’re too tight to throw it out, A menu for our local fish n chip shop, my polka dot headband, An early christmas card from Greg (the one that looks not remotely xmas-y and is instead black and white with trees on it), photo of Teeda and baby Annabelle, Magnet for the National Continence Hotline for all those bladder control issues we have, overdue phone bill, A polaroid of me when I was 16, magnets of sexy girls and Loz’s work timetable.

The kitchen. Pretty self explantory really. Glasses on the sink, random teatowels, regular bin, recycle bin and some sort of alcoholic beverage packaging. You might be able to just make out my little collection of Simpsons figurines and Buddhas that perch on my rangehood above the oven. They’re my kitchen mascots.

Telephone Nook. We’re going to get a set of barstools to go along the kitchen bench, so they’ll work well as telephone chairs aswell. The artwork was done by Loz’s friend Jo.

Looking out the front door. We’d have a perfect view of the bay if it weren’t for that damn tree in the way, but if you look closely you can see water.

Weekend in Photos

Standing in line at McDonalds Chelsea Heights last night at 1am, I overheard this strange exchange between two older men…

“Did you see Steve? He was just here…”
“Scuba Steve??”
“Nah, mate… Steve No Eyes”
“Ohhh…Nah, didn’t see him”

This exchange begs the following questions;

1) Who is Scuba Steve?
2) Who the fuck is Steve No Eyes?
3) Do you think Steve No Eyes saw the 2 guys in question? Or does he seriously have no eyes?

A mystery that will go unsolved, I’m afraid. Unless of course you know either of these characters, and then by all means let us know how old Scubes and No Eyes are going.

Here are some photos of the weekend.

These were taken Friday night. That’s Nate chillaxin on my bed with my washing and Chemo
Bear. The next picture is Greg wrestling Loz for my cowboy hat.

The insanity went on into the wee hours and ended with a 6am trip to my folks house to
drop off a cd she desperately needed to play for a presentation at school.
Can you tell we’re totally unimpressed with the early morning Sun?
I went home after this and got some shuteye. Hung out with Michael,
who was the mysterious inspiration for my crush I spoke of recently.
He’s not diggin it. We’re going to be mates. That was during the arvo.
I spent Saturday night with the clowns in the picture below.

Even Loz’s most eggsellent sandwich couldn’t make her
co-operative when it came to the camera today. We lazed around
while the boys painted the bungalow out the back, getting it ready
for Nate to move in next Thursday.
We eventually went in and annoyed them. That was their
cumuppance after having been terrors the night before.

Greg and Nate are the new Paris and Nicole. Lauren is the new Doogie Howser,
before he came out of the closet.

I haven’t seen this amount of crack since I was last in the back alleyways of Dandenong.
I made it black and white because admittedly, everyone looks better in black and white.
Loz and Bronny pose for their latest spread in Foot Fetishists Annual.

So as you can tell from the photos and partial comentary, I had a great weekend.
Highlights include Teeda falling thru my parents hammock and tearing it
in two, spending Saturday arvo in Mordi with Michael having fish n chips, lazing on the Banana lounge, cuddles with Greg, cuddles with Nate, Family guy in bed, the sunshine, me wearing a skin tight pair of Waders, although for most, that would be a
definite lowlight. Other lowlights include waiting in line at Maccas Saturday night
for over 30 mins, Columbos bucket going back on, 7 hours sleep between Friday and Monday morning, liking a boy who doesn’t like me back, leaving my sunniest at the folks place, the beach traffic along my street and the price of clothing at Target.

I wonder what Steve No Eyes got up to?

I hardly endorse these people or products

A few quick plugs;

If you want a laugh, check out the Fake McCoys latest YouTube video.

I also get the feeling Mr Jutters could take the Blogging World by storm! Remember this plug when you’re a blogging movie maker, Jutters!

</shameless plugs>

Far too Cold

Norris chillin on the PC Monitor.            Chuckys dangerous Coke addiction.

My 3 fave handbags, Fran will recognise the 3rd!                 Me when I got home tonight.

Greg attempting to eat my head off, and my stunned reaction to said act.

Columbo is now bucket free. She celebrated the removal of the bucket by running around the house like a headless chicken on Speed.
I’d say that’s an indication she’s happier sans bucket, wouldn’t you? You’d actually think that it was her little sad eyes that eventually made me remove the satellite dish from her head, but in all honesty, it was because she sleeps right up in my face with her head on the pillow, and last night I awoke to find my head in the bucket too. That was the straw that broke the camels back, and so off it came. Those sad eyes don’t work on me anymore. She’s a smart cookie to realise distracting my precious sleep was the way to victory.

Trivia last night. 3rd place. We called ourselves “That kid from the Grand Vitara ad gives us the shits” And he does! Every time I see him, I want to put my fist through the TV. To make matters worse, Loz and Teeda have started annoying me with that “Graaaaaaaaaaand Vitaaaaara” slur. It’s pissing me off no end. Worst Child Actor. Ever.

Tonight went with Teeds, Ange, Bron & Nate to Chadstone. Target is shitfully expensive for clothes. Since when did Target get all snooty with their prices? Then again, what I consider expensive and what most others consider expensive differ greatly. I’m a tightarse down to the last drop of DNA. It’s an inherited trait.

I’ll be happy to crawl into bed tonight, as I fell asleep on the couch last night. While it was comfortable at the time, it was a different story when I woke up. I’ve had a sore back all day. I’ll be excited when Nate brings back his couch as it provides a wonderful nights sleep on occasions where I nod off during a movie. Or a conversation with Greg. Haha

Tomorrow, Shaun is coming round to finalize everything with his website and business cards. Shauns a mate I’ve known since High School, who’s now a music journalist. Feel free to have a look at his site www.shauntopp.com.au. I’m thinking I’ll hit him up for concert tickets in leiu of payment. Actually, his dad wants a site done, and I’m considering doing it with payment in trade. He’s a Painter. Not the wall variety, but the artistic type. I’d love for him to paint a piece to place over my bed.

Tomorrow night is Andreas birthday. She’s turning 25. Happy Birthday Ange! She’s having some shindig in the city. Fingers crossed it’s not so ridiculously cold tomorrow night!
Saturday I’m going to get Nate to clean my room. I said I’d help, but he wants me out of his hair, or else I won’t let him throw out anything. I’m a hoarder, again it’s a heriditary thing.
I need him to be ruthless. It’d be nice to have some sembilance of an adult bedroom.
There’s fish n chips to be had on Saturday arvo with Michael. We’re going ito watch Capote, which I’ve wanted to see since it came out.

Sunday I look forward to a sunshiney lazy day with brunch in the backyard, coffee and the newspaper. Sunday is rapidly becomming one of my fave days of the week.

While I’m at it, I wanted to reply to a few comments from the last few days… I wish I had a livejournal style “reply to comment” button, but alas, Wordpress has no such feature.

Martie- Knowing you think I look good in red lippy makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Most times I think I look like a whore! Hahaha I’ve actually gone easy on the lippy since we moved in here, coz Loz is allergic to lipstick in all it’s forms (even gloss), so I try to lay off it incase she drinks out of one of my glasses etc. Thankyou tho!!

Joel the Mole (deckchair guru)- I know I can do the whole private thing, but when I started this whole blogging caper, I was dedicated to keeping it entirely public. Sometimes I think I should start another little blog, this time anonymously so I can spill everything. Haha Actually, no I’m about 95% open in this blog. The other 5% is stuff I keep to myself purely for the fact that sometimes it’s nice to have a little secret.  I wonder what’s in your private stuff? I’m curious now! Btw, how’s a little public action? I want more blogging from you!

couer de noir- I think they should be on the lead too! At least in the street!  Even though the council here have signs on beach about keeping dogs on leads, it’s pretty much a free for all down on the sand in the early evening. I’ve got no problems with them being off the leash, but they should be under voice control. It pisses me off that owners don’t take responsibilty for their animals and when they bite someone or attack another animal, it’s the dog who inevitably pays the price for the owners neglect. *grumble*
And yes, I would love to meet you! There’s actually quite a number of girls on my Livejournal I’d love to meet, like you and Fran and Sandie! For some reason, I’m always more scared of meeting women than guys! I’m waiting for the weather to get warmer to have Fran (from LJ ) round for a bbq, so when that happens I will let you know so hopefully you can come too!!!

The Jester & Adam in Sydney - Thank you both for your kind words! Knowing you guys are always there to support me means heaps! Hope you’re both doing well!!!! Not long til you move down here, Adam! The Jester shouldn’t be too far behind you, either!

I’ll reply to the rest of these tomorrow. Otherwise, I’m going to fall asleep at the keyboard.