Okay, I’m using the new version of LochJournal. Interesting, but I’m not sure I really like it. It’s a bit all over the place. It’s close to half 3am and I’m really not tired. I should be, I know, but I’m not.
I did manage to get a few things done today, which is always a good thing. I got a chance to go to the doctors to complain about the fact that I’ve had my period for close to 2 months and that my hair is falling out in massive amounts. I did a bit of skulking around on the net last nite, and realised that these are hideious side effects of using Depo Provera (a form of birth control that comes as a 3 monthly injection). Apparantly, there’s a whole angry mob of women who’s hair has fallen out after using this contraception! Obviously, I didn’t realise that the way Depo Provera worked was by making you bald, as so no man will ever want to come near you again!!
I mean, i’m lucky, coz I’ve got incredibly thick hair, so losing so much hair hasn’t really made a noticable difference to my appearance, but it’s certainly becoming annoying. I initially thought it was just the effects of Summer and perhaps, like the cat, I was malting. But boy, was I wrong! It’s basically hormone related. The doctor took a couple of viles of blood to send off for some testing, and the results will be in on Monday. He said the bleeding was a concern and wants me to come back in for a PapSmear. Which I really should have done, much earlier! He was also worried that it might be related to my Endometriosis. I’ll wait for the results and see what the options are.
I got in touch with an old friend tonite. Turns out, her Mum had found me online, and sent my details to her, for her to contact me. I didn’t see the note she’d left me til today, a month after she left it. Luckily, she was online at work when I happened to email her and I got a response in a matter of minutes. She called me later tonite, and we chatted for well over an hour. It was great to hear from her. I spent alot of my younger days with her. I remember we’d sit in her room, listening to The Doors and talking about how much we loved Jarvis Cocker of Pulp. We’d hire a bundle of horror movies every weekend, and terrify ourselves into a stupour late Saturday evening. We’d dissapear Sunday mornings for a walk, which was really only a guise for getting out of the house, to share a few Ciggies. We could barely smoke, I doubt we ever inhaled, but it was thrilling and exciting and set my heart racing. Before we got back to her place, we’d stop by the milk bar and buy a packet of Extra to disguise the smoke breath. Once inside her house, we’d run into her room and cover ourselves head to toe in Waterberry Impulse, just in case the smokey residue still remained on our clothes. They were good days. I miss the thrill I used to get by doing ‘naughty’ things. Stealing a sip of beer from an old relative, being naive enough to think that my parents didn’t know I was smoking, or that they’d believe parents would actually be in attendance at a party where there would be no drinking and no drugs.
I remember this girls 14th Birthday party. We had it at her grandparents and there were about 10 girls who came. We drank AC Cola and AC Orange all night, and ate way too many chippies. Later that nite, while we were sleeping, I started to feel unwell. I asked her mum to drive me home at 4am, and that she did. I felt so sick the whole way home, but I held it in…Until I got to the front door. I had to run to the garden to be sick. I remember my mum thanking her mum for bringing me home, and I got in the shower. Mid way thru the shower, my mum walked in and opened the shower screen door. “Have you been drinking??” I stupidly said Yes, because in my days of innocence, I thought she meant had I consumed a beverage. And well, yes, I’d been drinking AC Cola all night. I remember her being really angry, and for the life of me, I couldn’t work out why. I went to bed, and woke up in the mid afternoon. Mum never really mentioned anything after that, so I never mentioned it either. I think ever since, my mum thought I was drunk that night, when really I was just a 14 year old kid who had been drinking too much fizzy drink and jumping around to “Lump” by Presidents of the USA. No wonder I threw up.
I don’t know what made me think of that story. But it brings back fond memories. Well, obviously not the vomiting part, but the innocence and the fun we had.
Hahaha, I just remembered another story involving myself and the same girl. In our early days of highschool, we were both geeks. We sat together at lunchtime one day in the foyer, as it was raining outside. I remember sitting there talking and eating our lunch. I was in a silly mood, so when she picked up her juice to drink it, I leaned forward and squeezed it, hoping that juice would squirt all over her. How wrong I was. The only thing that happened was I pushed the container into her teeth, and it rammed into her braces and made her mouth start pissing out blood. As funny as it was, she wasn’t ammused and we didn’t speak for a good 2 days afterwards. What a classic. Jeez I was a bitch.
This has made me think about the best friends I’ve had in my life. You know the type that you classified as your “best friend” and wore friendship bands and all that jazz. It was the late 80’s/early 90’s. U know how it was.
My first best friend I can remember was a boy called Michael. He was a short red headed kid with a face full of freckles. Great little grin. He was the very first boy who ever kissed me on the lips. We must have been about six, and he kissed me after we got “married”. He ended up moving to Queensland, I think. The memory is vague, but is still there. Just.
Next was Renee, when I was about 9. We used to spend every waking minute with eachother. We’d go skating in Noble Park every Saturday afternoon, and Sundays too sometimes. We loved rollerskating, although she was much better at it than I was. I remember I loved going to her house, because her Mum was a single young bird who had concieved Renee at no more than 17. So, she still enjoyed all those immature things, like prank calling and movies with bad language. She had 2 dogs, called Paris and Harley. We’d sit around her room at night and listen to Guns N Roses. She was obsessed with them. She had this great glow in the dark tee shirt, she’d made with her mum, that had the names of all these GNR songs written on it, that glowed. She wore it whenever we skated at night. I was so jelous of her tee shirt. We ended up “breaking up” because I found out she had bought a ‘best friends’ necklace with Nicole, another school friend. I think about her fairly regularly and wonder what she’s doing these days.
Next was Jessica, at about age 10 thru to 13. We were so close, even our families became friends, and at one point, even our dads worked together. We used to go away together, to our families houses in the Country.
It ended badly after a slumber party. She fell asleep, and we thought it would be a lark to put flour on her face. You know the rules of a slumber party. If you are the first to sleep, then you shall suffer the wrath of glucose intoxicated prepubecents. She woke up mid way through, and I was the first person she saw. The next morning, when I got home, her mum had called my mum about it. Apparantly Jessica was pretty upset by it. My mum and I thought it was quite funny. We never really spoke after that, even though throughout the course of high school we saw eachother every day at the station. It wasn’t til we were 18, that we would exchange pleasentries if we saw eachother. She’d be a teacher nowadays.
As my friendship with Jess deteriorated, I took up with 2 girls that I had known throughout Primary School. Becky, who I had been close to since we were 7 or so, and Linda, who I met when I was 11. Becky was a rake thin, blue eyed blonde, that was the envy of every girl in Primary School. Linda, well she was a laugh. She was well developed for her age, was allowed to dye her hair, and could at times be, dumb as a post. I remember when they both got their periods before me, and I was so jelous. I felt like such a baby. I envied them so much. They seemed so much more mature than me. They wore jeans, I wore tracksuits. They dyed their hair, I got a dose of lice. One night, we had a party at Lindas, where I had my first pash, but that’s another story. After the boys went home, we went into Lindas room. We decided to dress up and have a fashion parade. I remember Becky telling me, that I couldn’t join in because Linda didn’t have anything big enough to fit me, so I could just watch. It broke my heart. I think it was the first time I ever thought about my weight in a negative way. After that party, we never really spoke again. There have been times when I’ve seen Becky or her parents around, and we’ve stopped and caught up briefly but nothing really more. I heard that Linda is now married and has kids. Becky, well, I don’t know what she’s doing. Last I heard she was living in Keysborough with her convict boyfriend.
Then there was Erin H, who I spoke about earlier.
I didn’t have a best friend, or even a close friend until I was in Year 10. I became close to Erin K, but I always felt like an outsider, as her best friend was Shannon, and they had been for many years. They lived opposite eachother, so I never really got the inside jokes.
There was Dineri, but I always knew in my heart of hearts, that she would be a fair weather friend. She was my oldest friend, that I’d known since Primary school. She ended up sleeping with my ex boyfriend James, only seconds after James and I had broken up.
And then there was Teeda. We were never very close during school. We never spent much time together, and had different interests. It wasn’t until she moved to Keysborough, that we became close. And then, I moved to Hawthorn, and we became even closer. I remember the nite I realised she was the best friend I’d ever had. We were sitting in my lounge talking for hours and hours and hours. Before we knew it, the dawn had broken and we were still chatting away. She’s been a complete rock for me, over the last few years. When other friends were few and far between, Teeda was always there. She’s never turned on me, never made me feel stupid, never have I felt I couldn’t trust her with any confidances. She’s never taken someone elses word over mine when it came to our friendship, never made me doubt why I’m her friend. In fact, she’s always there. Whenever I need her. Sometimes, when this journal hasn’t been updated, it’s because I’ve been able to let it all out to her, and thus haven’t felt the need to vent in here. She’s like my other Journal, where no entries are private, where I don’t censor my thoughts, and I can whinge and cry about anyone and everything. She never deletes the entries, or freezes half way through my ramblings. She’s a much more effective journal than LJ lol. Better yet, she can give immediete feedback.
I don’t know what has made me write this entry. I’m just in one of those moods to go on and on.
But I wont, for the sake of bandwidth.
Love Prue
He’s cute as a button! I loved Finding Nemo! Man, is there any pixar film I don’t like!? Although Toy Story 2 could do without that girl cowboy, cos she gives me the irrits.
Makes me feel good watching it!