pruesaysit.com

Teething Problems

So I went to the Dentist the other day to finally arrange having my top 2 Wisdom teeth out. I was really worried and anxious about what the Dentist would be like…Most I’ve seen have been terrible. But this guy was lovely! He reminded me of Hector Alezondo… you know the guy from Pretty Woman and Chicago Hope? The mere fact he looked like someone I like put me at ease instantly. He told me he’d be able to take them out in 30 mins! Could you believe it? I told him he’d want to do a good job of it, because the last Dentist I saw ended up on THE LIST. He laughed and told me he’d use plenty of Anesthetic to make sure he doesn’t end up on THE LIST. So now that that is sorted and I have an appointment to have my teeth out, I’m feeling much more relieved. 19th June…. c’mon June!

Speaking of the 19th of June, that’s the last day of my Lease here. I told you my Landlord gave me a notice to vacate yes? What a cunt. But then again, it’s totally for the best coz this house is falling apart and my Lanlord is an absolute arsehole. Although, looking for a house at the moment is a nightmare. Seriously, a total nightmare. We applied for a place last week in Parkdale… we were the first ones in with an application… we gave them a folder that had everyones payslips and references in it, and still we didn’t get the house. They gave it to the couple with the baby on the way. Fuck couples in the arse! They are the bane of my existence at the moment. They are thwarting every chance we have at finding a place to live.
The pressure to find somewhere to live is mounting. The fact that Nate isn’t paying the rent here certainly isn’t helping matters! I’m in constant fear of falling 14 days behind in the rent and having them evict us even earlier than June. So yes, as you can tell, the housing issue is definitely a big stress for me right now.

The other day a guy I know told me that I was a spectacular woman and that any man would be lucky to snag me. It totally made my day. It was really sweet to hear someone say that.

In other news, I am ridiculously horny and need to get back on the horse soon. 12 months is a long time my friends. I think I’ve missed kissing more than anything to be honest…oh and spooning. Can’t forget spooning.

Any and all donations of AA Batteries and/or housing gladly accepted.

If you’re curious, email me.

I just wrote some super hot erotica. I’d post it but it might shock some people! If I could, I’d totally fuck me…it’s just that hot.
It wasn’t actually erotica, it started as an email and just ended up like that. Move over JT, I’m bringin sexy back. Yep.

Maybe He’s Right

The other day Nate and I were in the car, heading towards Mentone, and we got to talking about love and relationships. Nate mentioned that if things don’t work out with this girl he’s got his eye on at the moment, he’s giving up.
“You can’t do that…” I said.
“Why? You have, haven’t you?” replied Nate.
I kinda sat there with my mouth agape for a few seconds.
Have I? Have I really given up on finding someone who I love and who might actually love me back? I hadn’t thought about it to be honest, nor made any sort of conscious decision to neglect that specific area of my life but maybe it’s inevitable to retreat from something that in the past has caused so much pain? Which is no great surprise, given that 9 out of 10 therapists agree, I am the Queen of Avoidant Behavior.

The past few years has seen me become infatuated with men who are entirely unavailable, physically and emotionally. It’s just a pattern that keeps repeating and I don’t realise until I’m stuck in the eye of the storm. I am the confidante, the keeper of secrets, the one who “understands” them, but never the one they go home to. How many times must I hear “I never meant to hurt you” ? ”I like you/ love you/ am so in love with you but I can’t because I will only hurt you/ promised myself I’d never love again/ am staying with a girl I am not in love with but don’t have the balls to leave”

Maybe I have given up? It seems as though I’m always going to be the other woman, even when there’s no other woman involved. I’m the ‘other woman’ to a busy work schedule, unresolved emotional issues, etc. I’m tired of playing that role. Don’t think I haven’t tried the ’shit or get off the pot’ approach either. I just lack the convictions to stay true to my word. I feel guilty when I put my foot down, like I don’t have a right to. I’m made to feel like a demanding bitch when I say “Make up your mind” after years of being strung along.

Man, my love life sucks arse, it really does. Right now, I really do feel like giving up on the whole love thing and just heading down to the Animal Shelter to collect a trailer load of cats.

I never knew Reindeer weren’t fictional

While I’m not actually feeling the *squee* and cute overload of these images right now, I did enjoy them Friday when I went to Myuna Farm with Loz and the little boy she Nannies for.

Don’t get me wrong, the wet nose and massive eyelashes of this Reindeer melt me, I’m just that I’m in an oddly depressed and lonely mood. It’s that romantic loneliness too, which sucks. Furry whiskers and big ears aren’t going to fix it.

It would just be nice to have a non-furry cuddly companion to snuggle up with on the couch on a Saturday night. Oh god, I just re-read that and it sounds ridiculous. I sound like the cat lady I always talked about becomming. I mean, it would be nice to be a cat lady, but fuck, not at 25! I hadn’t planned on the cat lady thing for at least another 40 years!

 Here, have some pictures of cute animals to make up for this lack lustre emotional whiney post.

The Kitty Has Mojo

Lately I’ve been hornier than the couple on the front of the packet of the Horny Goat Weed box. Yes, that voracious couple with the horns going at it that stare at me every time I walk down the “Feminine Needs” aisle of my local Safeway. I suspect it’s Springs timely influence.

The closest I am to any action right now is watching my cat meet her fluffy ginger boyfriend outside every night. It’s actually incredibly adorable. He sneaks into our driveway, then cries for her non stop til she either a) comes out to see him or b) pokes her head thru the curtains and they make eyes at eachother til he has to go home.
The other night I was out for dinner with Andrea and Greg, and Loz called me from home. This is how the conversation went…

P-”Hello! What’s happening?
L-”Ummmm….I walked into the bathroom because I heard a sound, and what do I see? YOUR CAT and her BOYFRIEND sitting in the bath together!”
<Cue Laughter from My End>
L-”Ummm he hasn’t even introduced himself to us, we haven’t met his parents, she’s too young to be bringing him home!”
P-”You’re right, but at least he’s now coming round at a respectable hour!”
L-”Well I don’t care, I put him back out the window! And now he’s sitting outside crying for her! And she’s crying for him! It’s very Romeo and Juliet….I should have let him stay in, should I open the window again?”
P-”Yeah, why not… if he comes back in, take a photo of them both”

The above conversation indicates that a) I honestly believe my cat is a person b) my cat is a tart just like her mother c) It’s a sad state of affairs when I’m living vicariously through my cats love life.

I finally had to pull my sexy red acrylic nails off today. I’m sure the done thing is to just go back and have them refilled, but I can’t really justify spending $35 on a regular basis just to have pretty nails. Turns out while my real nails were covered by a bite proof substance, they have grown substantially and I now officially have white bits! You know where they go white at the top, indication some sort of growth? That’s what I have! All my life I’ve wanted white bits! Granted, my nails feel like they’re thinner than Nicole Ritchie, I’m not letting it get in the way of my excitement over white.

Teeda is moving out come December. I will be sad not to have her around the house, as living in a girly house has been a wonderful experience, but she wants to save and I suspect she misses her mums cooking. It appears Nate will be moving back in to make up the final third of the rent. He’s going to take the back bungalow, and perhaps we will turn the room Teeda had into a study. It might be nice to have a bedroom that is purely a bedroom. Having the PC in my room keeps me up too late! Plus, my other PC will be reformatted and Loz can use that as her own, so a study would definetely be handy.

Anyways, I have some dreaming to attend to. Hope you’re all well.

Edit: Just to put everyones minds at rest, yes Columbo is Desexed.

Getting the JOB done!

Do you ever have that problem when you’re bored at home, and you figure “Hey, I’ve got some spare time up my sleeve…I’ll masterbate!” and so then you’re getting into it but no matter how hard you try, or how much you relax you still can’t orgasm? What’s going on there? I mean, when you’re with someone it’s really not about the end result but the fun you have while you’re getting there. But when you’re flying solo, it’s really all about getting off. I always feel so disappointed when I can’t climax when I’m getting myself off. I want to pat myself on the back and excuse my performance citing lack of sleep or some equally as lame excuse.
“This barely ever happens, I’m so sorry Prue..”
“It’s alright, it was great. I’m sure it’s normally awesome. It’s nothing to worry about. You must be tired”

I wasted an hour of my day trying to get the job done, and it just wasn’t happening. I pulled out all the heavy artillary. I could power a small nation with the amount of batteries rolling around in my bedside drawer. But still, nothing worked. I think I’ve lost the ability to get off the old fashioned way. I can’t remember the last time I devoted any time to Mrs Palmer and her 5 daughters. I’m a high tech wanker, what can I say? But then I worry what will happen when battery operated devices won’t cut the mustard. What will I do then? I don’t think 240 volt plug in the wall devices are particularly safe. Will I have to resort to one of those Fucking Machines? You know those things with gears and gyrating poles with dongs on the end that run off some sort of generator? Here’s hoping I find a boyfriend before that becomes a viable option. I can’t afford the shipping and handling on the import of one of those things! Though I’m sure in the long run it would be cheaper than a man.

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Went to bed at 10.30pm last night. Had the best sleep. Although, I woke up at 5.30am and just lay there, wide awake. Damn my body clock to hell.
So I spent the morning laying there, with the cat, cuddling and playing with her, til I got out of bed at 6.30 and made some toast.

At 8am, I called the doctors to make an appointment to have my Implanon put in.
Yay for contraception. Not that it will be my only form of contraception, obviously, but it’s always nice to have a back up and to be safe.
To be honest, I miss unprotected sex…within a monogomous committed relationship, obviously! There’s nothing better, than waking up next to your partner, and still being in that dozey, asleep stage, and feeling them inside you, while they’re arms are wrapped tight around you.

It’s been a long time since I had that! I can barely remember it!
I’ve had unprotected sex once in the 2 years I’ve been single, and it was with DW, in a ‘heat of the moment/passion fueled frenzy’ kinda thing. Thank the good lord for the morning after pill, but damn it was hot!

Sorry for that post about the pebble thing the other nite. I was feeling terrible and I really felt like my life was adversely affecting other people. That’s a dreadful feeling, especially when it’s to do with my anxiety, and being something I can’t control. I don’t know why I chose that analogy the other night, but in hindsight, it was pretty good huh? lol

My tummy hurts…friggin uterus. If i had a dollar for every post that contained the phrase “Friggin uterus” i’d be a hundredaire. Then you’d all want me! lol

Okay okay, I’m just rambling now!

Big shout out to Adam in Sydney, who I didn’t msg back the other day coz I had no credit. Your text msg’s are always appreciated, as is your concern and good thoughts! Hope you’re doing well mate.

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I didn’t go to bed til, god…about 8am? I spent all nite up and chatting to someone online. His name is J and he’s an amazing fantastic guy and we’ve been talking for a few weeks now. Although I went to bed disheartened because nothing can eventuate between us. It’s a long story. I’ve wanted to write about him on a billion ocassions of late, but I can’t. There’s nothing to tell, anyway.
I slept for most of the day, then I caught up with Jim and we went to Parkmore. I bought a stack of bonds singlets in pink, green and black, 2 new pairs of bras, matching undies, and a few other bits and pieces. I’ve decided I’m going to take one of the black singlets and pretty it up with some pink ribbon I bought…It should look pretty good, in theory that is. Hahaha In all practicality, my sewing skills leave a lot to be desired, so it will probably end up cut to shreds and on my bedroom floor as a reminder to never pull a Martha Stewart again.

Remind me to buy myself Ravi Shankar- East meets West Want that album big time

Oh YES I also bought the cutest piggy jamas in Big W. They’re grey and hot pink! So comfy and rockin. Love love love!

I wish I had something poetic and insightful to tell you all, but I’m going to disappoint you and tell you I don’t.

I’m horny as all hell and need a long, slow, drawn out slice of action.