pruesaysit.com

Homely Home

Garfield in PJ’s having a snooze on my bed.

My awesome mid century dresser.

Meezer Salt and Pepper Shakers to keep my Hawaiian girl company.

To see the rest of my room/house, click here.

An Email Turned Post

Nate wanted me to send him an email of what’s going on in my life right now. This is what I wrote;

Well let me see. Today is my 9th day on the Lexapro. I switched medications again after 2 months on the Luvox. It did nothing but make me sick and put me in a grumpy mood all the time. Mum said I didn’t even seem like myself while I was on it. So I went medication free for 7 days, which was surprisingly easy. I hadn’t been medication free in so long but it wasn’t as terrible as I imagined it might be. I’m not well enough to not take it, but it was interesting to see what I was like off it. Anyway, the last 8 days, I’ve vomited after eating or drinking anything. I’m kinda worn out. But yesterday I didn’t hurl once, which was a pleasant surprise.
Being off the Aropax has substantially improved my sleep pattern. I’m in bed by half ten most nights and up before 8am. I actually feel awake during the day, which is an awesome feeling. For so long, being awake during the day felt like I was walking in a fog. Now it’s bright and sunny and people are noticing the difference. Even my shrink.

Let’s talk about her shall we? She’s great. She’s noticed a big change in me since I came off Aropax. Although, the session prior to my last was a nightmare. I was an absolute mess. That day is what prompted me to get off the Luvox. I was having serious thoughts about killing myself and I was in tears and really, I was just a mess. It was the first time she’d seen me lose it. I just sat in her office and cried for most of the hour. I got off that medication the day after. Two weeks later, I was a different person. No thoughts of harming myself or feeling like I wanted to die… I felt calm. I still do. Yeah the vomiting’s a bit of a nightmare (I’ve so far vomited in the Richies Car Park, Mitre 10 carpark, Mum’s car, the front yard, the backyard, the garage, the parents house, Jo’s car) but I’m kinda used to it now and it sorta seems to have subsided. I want to give this medication a good go.

Monitoring my medication will be a Psychiatrist at Pine Lodge in Dandenong. I haven’t had an appointment with them yet, but I’m waiting for it. It won’t be to talk or anything really, just to monitor my meds and see how they’re going. I’m also doing the Personal Support Program through Skills Plus. Centrelink referred me there. I was really really nervous about it and cancelled the appointment 3 times before I actually went. It was while I was a complete mess. I finally told the lady at Skills Plus what was going on and how my meds were affecting me and she was really sympathetic. Most of her clients are on some sort of medication for mental illnesses as well so she understands what it can be like. I finally went and saw her and she was lovely. Very compassionate and understanding. She wants me to focus on getting my medication right and then I have another appointment in November to talk about how I’m feeling and what they might be able to offer me.

I told the lady at Skills Plus how I want to study. And I actually really do. I have found this course in Child Birth Education and Pre and Post Natal Doula (a birth partner) work that I’d love to do. I thought I’d have to wait til I had repaid Centrelink so I could borrow that 500 bucks from them, but they might be able to help me out with funding which would be awesome. It’s something I’m really passionate about and I think I’d be great at it.

At home, things are going well for the most part. There’s some drama at the moment about bills (not me, thankgod!) but apart from that, everything is good. The house really feels like home. It’s the kind of house I’m not embarrassed to have people over to and it really feels like an adult home. We’ve really taken lots of care to make it a comfortable, good looking, warm home. We had my folks and Laurens mum Pauline over on the weekend for lunch. We sat outside in the sunshine and ate fresh rolls and fruit and sipped on Lemon lime and bitters. It was the perfect way to spend an afternoon.

There’s no love life to speak of. James is apparently taking some time to get himself together, but I’m not sure how serious he is about it. You know the majority of stuff that’s gone on between him and I. It turned super dramatic 2 weeks or so ago, when he got really super trashed and told me he’d always loved me. He’d never told me that before. Maybe it was just that drunk kinda stuff that people say and then wake up in the morning and think “oh god, why did I say that?!” That wasn’t all he said that night. He said some horrendous things to me that night as well. Enough for me to realise that he needs to pull himself together before anything could possibly happen, and that I won’t have anything to do with him until he does. It’s been hard and I think about him every day but I know that’s it for the best.  Outside of James, there is no one. I’m just focusing on me for the time being. The complication of you know what wouldn’t be in my best interest right now, as much as my libido disagrees.

There ya go

Back to the Blog

I finally found the motivation I needed to start blogging again. I had so many problems with my database, but thankfully for me, the guy at the Webhosting place loaded the backup from July, and it seems to be unaffected by the shitty spyware that infiltrated my SQL database. Yay!! Now I don’t have to fuck around trying to remove the affected entries! Why didn’t I just email my webhost in the first place? lol I’m such a cock. End geek ramble.

Let me try and organise this post into topics…

New House- So the move came and went, and I managed to escape with my bond intact. There was talk of VCAT but he’d have lost, so he decided against it. We moved into a 4 bedroom plus study double story house only minutes from our last residence. It’s a really great place and about a thousand times better than any of the other places we looked at before here. I’m so glad that we didn’t get any of the other places we applied for, because all of them were far too small for 4 chicks, 2 cats and a dog. We’ve got heaps of room here for everyone without being on top of eachother, so it’s worked out really fortunately, given that as soon as we moved in, Loz, Jo and Squish all got boyfriends! We’d never have been able to fit 7 ppl in any of the other houses we saw.

You can see Chloe Dog and Muffy cat chillin on the couch in the loungeroom above.

Mum- It was my Mum’s 50th Birthday at the end of July and to celebrate the milestone, she threw herself out of a plane. Personally, I’m more a cake kinda person, but Mum had an awesome time and she loved it and she wants to do it again and again. Here’s a link to the video of the day on Youtube.

Medication/Anxiety/Depression- I changed medications just over a month ago. Coming off my old Anti-Depressants (Aropax/Paxil) was an absolute nightmare. I spent weeks feeling sick and gross, wishing I was a bear so I could go into hibernation for the duration. My new medication seems to be okay, but I haven’t worked out the right dosage yet. I mean I feel okay, but there’s very few peaks or dips. I also have trouble dealing with feeling frustrated…I’ve either snapped or just totally isolated myself. Maybe it’s not the right medication for me, but I want to give it a good go before I discount it. Perhaps I just need the dosage tweaked a little bit? I’m going to speak to my doctor about it this week.
In other medical news, I also had my Implanon replaced. I’ve sorta broken out in zits since I had it put in 2 or 3 months ago, but apart from that, it’s been smooth sailing on the contraceptive front.

Love/Sex- I don’t even know what to write in this bit. If I had a clue, I’d tell you. There is some sex though, which is always good. After waiting over a year, it was good to get back in the saddle. He’s a nice guy and we have fun together, but our hearts are both elsewhere.

Other Stuff- I’m going to Mildura to visit Nate in a week and a bit. I haven’t seen him since we moved into the new house, so I have missed him heaps and am looking forward to heading up there and hanging out for a few days. I’m totally hanging to go fishing.

That’s about all I have at the moment, but it feels good to start writing again.

One More Sleep

If this week sucked any harder, it would be a porno sponsored by Hoover. Moving sucks, and I’d tell you all about it if you hadn’t heard the same story about a dozen times before! Seriously, how the fuck do I acquire so much shit? Thankfully, the Landlord let us have the keys a few days early, so we’ve been able to take boxes and bags over the new house, but it’s not until tomorrow morning that we’ll have all the furniture in there. It’s great that we didn’t have to do it all on one day, but when you do it over the course of a week, it’s easy to get over the excitement of moving.

After we get all the new crap to the new house, I’m coming back here to start cleaning with Nate (who has decided to grace us with his presence lol) and the rest of the girls are going to put the house together.
Until we get a phone number on Tuesday (Optus Wireless homephone ftw!), I can’t organise any Internets so I might be away for a while. Hopefully, I’ll be able to find somewhere to check it til the crisis is averted.

Btw, a note to you… I thought you’d have written by now? Or is this it?

I have to be up early tomorrow but I might be able to update with some photos tomorrow. If not, I’ll catch you all soon

Up and Down

We went and signed the lease on Saturday. You can’t imagine what a relief it is to have found a place and settled the whole living situation out. This week will be a busy one, packing and trying to offload all the shit I can. I’m gonna try and travel as lightly as I can.

Mystery Illness still plagues me. Really bad cough + fatigue + hurling once/twice daily= Miserable Prue.
When I go and get my Implanon taken out on Thursday, I’ll try and make an appointment to see the doctor about it. I’ve gotta go to Monash to have it taken out under ultrasound because it’s the initial insertion was too deep which sucks, but small price to pay given it’s been such an awesome contraceptive. Viva la Implanon! I’m going to have another shoved thru my arm next week sometime.

Fuck, I just realised I’m probably going to have a bitchin sore arm when I’m moving house on the weekend! Boooo! Hiss!!

I finally got around to changing the blonde foils in my hair to red. It looks so much better! Between being sick the past 3 weeks and feeling super self conscious about my hair, I’ve felt fairly average lately. Plus, I had this huge argument with James during the week so yeah, the past week or so has had it ups and downs.

I told you Collie Cat came home yes? The bloody knob was in my neighbours garage! She ran in there to take cover from the rain…which intrigues me, given that she has a garage here that she could lurk in all day if it took her fancy! She’s lucky I love her to death, coz otherwise she’d drive me crazy.

Anyways, I have stuff to move to the new house in the morning, so I gotta hit the sack.

Dude, where’s my cat?

It’s early and I haven’t been able to sleep because Collie Cat didn’t come home last night. I hate it when she pulls these late night capers because it makes me feel like an arsehole pet owner and super irresponsible.
I’m sure she’s probably taken cover somewhere to avoid the inclement weather or is stuck in someones garage and will be home for breakfast soon enough, or at least that’s the way it’d better go or I’ll be an unhappy and pedantic camper.

The last few weeks I’ve been really sick. For over a week, I couldn’t keep any food down at all. It was odd…I wouldn’t feel nauseous, I’d just get the overwhelming sensation of wanting to be sick. Combine that with being super fatigued and the kind of coughing that would put an Emphysema patient to shame and that’s been my life for the last 2 weeks. Thankfully the hurling has ceased, but the cough is lingering and I’m flat out knackered at the moment.

Lucky for me, today brought with it good news. We have finally found a place to live! It totally fell into our laps and the Landlady adores us! It’s in Aspendale Gardens…2 storey, 4 bedrooms plus study, ducks that live in the ceiling and blow down hot and cold air, a freakin dishwasher and would you believe, she’s cool with pets!? Fuck, it’s such a relief to have finally found somewhere. I’ve been so stressed out here the past 3 months. Money issues, problems with our Landlord generally being a cunt…that sorta thing. Plus, house hunting was honestly driving me to tears. Any time we found a place that was suitable, it was out of our price range, out of someones comfort zone for proximity to work/family/station…and the houses we did see and apply for, we were beaten out by families and couples. It really has just been a fairly shitty month or so.

So finding a house is one thing on the list crossed off. The others items are now packing and moving (if you know me, you’ll know what a freakin hoarder I am!) and getting the bond back here which I’ve heard from previous tenants could be hard work. This is meant to be in 2 weeks time.

You know what else will be happening in 2 weeks time? I’ll be coming off my medication. Won’t that be a barrell of fun! Oh and I also have to have my wisdom teeth removed on June 19th. So you know, all in all, I’m shitting my pants with stress going to cope wonderfully with all of these issues. *grumble*

Anyway, I’m off to bed to wait for Collie cat to come home.

x

Houston…

WE HAVE A HOUSE!

that is all.

Fuck Landlords In The Arse

I feel like shit at the moment. I have this cold/flu thing that has been circulating amongst my friends and it’s totally wiped me out. All I’ve wanted to do is sleep…yes, even more than usual. People always look at me strangely when I say this, but surely I’m not the only person who’s skin hurts when they are unwell? Like, my skin is so sensitive and it aches so badly when I’m crook, but every time I’ve told people that they look at me like I’m the Bearded Lady’s even beardier and more portly conjoined twin. I just get that “WTF?” look.

If I wasn’t feeling so average, I’d be excited to tell you that we finally got a heater today! Yeah, so it took 6 months to come but it’s here…I think they were hoping we’d have left before they had to actually replace it. But at the rate we’re going, we could be here right up until the last possible day. Rental inspections are at ridiculous times like 1.40pm-1.50pm on a Monday, so it’s hard for everyone to see the properties, and even if they have been suitable, landlords can be so fussy now that they don’t take the first eligible applicant…they can pick and chose exactly who they want coz demand outweighs supply. It’s insane. The prices we’re looking at paying are twice what it would have cost a year or 2 ago. Shithouse.

Anyway, that’s about all I can tell you at the moment. I’m too knackered to write about anything else tonight. Stay tuned.