Pruesaysit,

My husband wants us to have a 3some. It’s not that I’m not keen, in fact, I’m really turned on by the idea, but I don’t know who to ask? I have a girlfriend who I messed around with a few times in my mid 20′s, but things would feel kind of awkward I think. Should we go online to find someone?

Meat in the Middle, Hopefully

Yeah, you could do the online thing, but to be honest, it’s probably more trouble than it’s worth. Don’t ask your girlfriend. It might have been different one crazy night in your 20′s after a pub crawl and some joints, but it gets a bit blurrier when you’re married. My advice, see a professional. Discuss with your parnter what you’re looking for, both chose and both enjoy, and both walk away knowing that it’s done, no ties. There’s not that worry that can occasionally creep in after you ask a known friend to to get it on and they say no. With a professional guy or girl, you’d can exactly what you both want, guilt free and go home and enjoy the memory a few times over. It will be money well spent in not having the stress afterwards that can sometimes come with that territory. Once you get the feel for it, then go with your gut.  

Pruesaysit,

I recently found out my boyfriend had been cheating on me for several months. I’m seriously devestated. We’ve been together 6 years. He says he doesn’t love this girl and that he wants to be with me. He said he wouldn’t have any further contact with her if I stayed with him. He has since asked me to marry him. I didn’t give him an answer, I have no idea what to do?

LonelyGirl29

I don’t know him, I don’t know the girl, I don’t know the situation. I know at times we are bound between the rigerous rules of what’s right and what’s wrong in a relationship and where the boundry lays between the two. You have to figure out if you can forgive him and move on, because it’s easy for it to be a source of contention later during relationship arguments. You have to be willing to truly forgive and forget if you want it to work out. And then maybe look at the boundries you guys have and where the desire to be with other women is coming from. Otherwise, there’s the option to end 6 years worth of relationship. You gotta listen to your gut in these situations. There’s few things less devestating than expecting monogomy and having it broken, so listen to your heart, not what your girlfriends are telling you to do coz you have to decide if you want to be this guys wife.

Pruesaysit,

I’m the other woman in a guys relationship. I don’t know how to reconcilie myself to that? I never set out to be someones other woman, but it just happened and now I feel I’ve crossed a really shitty line. Is it shitty?

Other Woman

Otherwoman,

I get that not a lot of women grow up wanting to be a guys bit on the side, having to be satisfied with the scraps he has left for you, coz basically that’s what it is isn’t it? It makes a lot of women in the situation feel pretty crappy from going from that woman they always hated, to the woman who’d be scorned if they knew. The act was shitty, but that doesn’t make you a shitty person. You obviously feel remorse for the situation this affair has put everyone in and shitty people don’t think about it from anyone elses perspective. All kinds of people cheat. Good, bad, religious, rockstar, geek, they’re all just people and they’re all capable of a shitty choice. And you don’t have to be some temptress to be the other woman.
It’s not about whether it’s moral or not tor you to be the other woman, but whether it’s right for you? If it’s keeping you up at night or making you feel miserable more often than happy, it might be time to find someone with more time on their hands.